Unwell
by zibzabzoobity
Summary: John Lupin considers the fate of his recently bitten son.


John Lupin was sitting in the dining room, arms crossed over his chest and staring out the window beside him, out at the forest that surrounded the Lupin cottage. He heard the faintest sniff come from the doorway, he turned his head to see his son, Remus, standing in the doorway clutching his favorite raggedy teddy bear, his nose and eyes red from crying.

His fatherly instincts kicked in immediately, he sat foreword and reached out to his son, who approached him with some reluctance. "What's the matter son?" he asked. The boy said nothing; he trotted over to his father who pulled the boy up into his lap. It took several silent moments of sniffling until Remus decided to speak. "Mummy's crying…" he said softly.

John stiffened at this. His wife had been in some emotional fragility since Remus was bitten by a werewolf some months ago. She had done her best to put on a stern face for her son but the mask must have begun to slip at last. John pulled his son's head to his chest and let him cry in silence.

"It'll be alright Remus. Your mother is just a little sad."

"Is she crying because of me?" Remus turned and looked up at his father with bright blue eyes, still young and innocent like a child's should be. But John wondered if that light was beginning to fade with each passing moon.

John gave his son a sad little smile. "Your mother is just sad that you're sick. That's all."

Remus sniffed and continued to stare up at his father. "Is mummy going to send me away?" the boy's lip quivered as he spoke, trying his best not to break down entirely.

John took Remus by the shoulders and held him out in front of him. "Why would you think that?" he asked, his voice suddenly stiff with fatherly authority.

The boy ducked his head and looked down at the head of the teddy bear that was resting in his lap. "I saw what you and mummy were reading…about werewolfs. You're going to send me to live in a in-in-stootion like the other mummies and daddies?" When Remus looked up at his father again, his expression was one of pure fear and dread.

"No," said John, loud and stern. "Never. Remus. We will _never _send you away, you hear me? Never. I want you to get that out of your mind this instant."

Remus nodded his head vigorously before burying his head into his father's shoulder. "'M sorry…" he said, his voice muffled as he spoke into his father's shoulder.

"It's alright. I just don't want you ever thinking that I or your mum don't love you. Because we would do anything for you Remus. We would never leave you." Inside, he was cursing himself. Cursing himself for being so stupid, so foolish.

It was no secret around the Beast Division at the Ministry that John Lupin's son was Greyback's latest victim. He thought he would go mad if he had to pass another coworker who gave him a look of pity, remorse or disgust. He was given a lot of "advice" on how to deal with Remus's condition. Yesterday, intern Umbridge had come up to John when they passed in the hall...

"_Good afternoon Lupin," she said. With that sickeningly pleasant voice of hers. John did not care for the woman, but her internship was over in a few weeks and then he'd never have to be subjected to her eerie pleasantness and disgusting sense of fashion ever again._

"_Intern Umbridge," he growled. He made to walk past her but saw she was aggressively blocking his path at his every chance to advance past her. _

"_Sorry to hear about young Ruben." _

"_It's Remus."_

"_Oh! Silly me!" Umbridge drew a tiny hand to her mouth and giggled in that irritating way she was always doing. "Have you looked into any kind of alternative care for him? I hear London Holding is shaping up to be quite a-" _

"_My son isn't going to be sent to any institution. Now if you'll excuse me." He made to move past her again but with a few quick steps the plump little intern blocked his path again. _

"_Now now now!" said Umbridge. "I know it sounds like a spooky little place to send the crea-child. But you mustn't judge these places too harshly. They're only built to help. Now-" she reached down and began digging through her pink dragonskin purse before pulling out a thin booklet. "I'm not letting you go anywhere Mister Lupin until you take this and at least give it a good readthrough. And no skimming! I'll know!" She giggled again, and something in the glint of her eye told John that she was entirely serious about knowing weather or not he had actually read the pamphlet. _

It was a quick read, and nothing he did not already know from his coworkers at the Ministry. Carelessly, he had tossed the pamphlet across the bedroom and left it there, unaware of how easily his son would stumble across it and begin to get the wrong idea about his parent's plans for him.

"Someone...someone at work gave that to me. But I have no intention of ever sending you to that place. You hear me? Ever."

Remus had stopped crying and nodded, pulling his teddy up to his chest. "I didn't mean to make mummy sad." Remus buried his face back into his father's chest. John closed his eyes and began to stroke his son's head soothingly.

"What did I say? Hmm? Mum is just sad that you're sick, it's not you're fault. She just doesn't like seeing you hurt."

"When will the moon stop hurting daddy?"

John closed his eyes, feeling a hot tear roll down his cheek. Poor Remus did not yet understand. He did not yet understand what happened to him at full moon. The boy's mind was lost to the wolf before he could comprehend his own metamorphosis. All he could ever remember the morning after...was the pain. He believed that this sickness, this thing that tore through him every month would come and go like a cold. He did not have the heart to tell his son that this particular hurt would never, ever go away. And it was all John's fault.

He felt a tiny hand on his cheek, wiping the tear away. "Now I've made you sad too! I'm sorry!" John looked down to see his son on the verge of tears to have caused his parents so much sadness.

"Oh Remus," John pulled his son into a tight embrace, nearly threatening to break his son in half with the weight of his love. The boy did not complain, he relished in his father's touch, feeling his strong heartbeat thump in his ear.

"I love you daddy."

"I love you too Remus."

He would be damned if he would allow his son to be doomed for the rest of his life. Weighed down by his affliction. Remus would have as normal a life as John could provide. That day he swore it. Remus would not succumb to the pain and despair that claimed so many bitten children, sapped of their youth and innocence. That would not be Remus's fate.

"I swear Remus...I swear," John muttered into his son's hair.

"Swear what, daddy?"

"Nothing son."

* * *

"Peppermint taffy," said John. The gigantic statue grumbled and turned, revealing the staircase to the Headmaster's office.

The Headmaster was seated at his desk. He gave John a warm, pleasant sort of smile as John approached him. "Mister Lupin," the Headmaster stood and shook John's hand.

"Headmaster Dumbledore." John gave the older wizard the firmest handshake he could muster.

"Please John, call me Albus." The wizard lowered himself back into his chair, gesturing for John to take the seat across from him.

"Now. Do tell me about Remus. I hear he's a rather special little boy."


End file.
